It's late. But it's usually those words that you cannot sleep without getting down that are the ones worth saying the most?these moments are few and far between- especially when one learns that it is better to listen than to speak.
I've been doing much listening lately. I recently accepted a position at a Psychiatric Unit at a local hospital. My job as Counselor is to work with children and adolescents who are emotionally unstable. I must say, it's changing my life.
In order to keep confidentiality, I can't go into the names of these kids, and I don't even want to give detail to where I work?but I want to share some of these experiences, and the priceless lessons these kids are teaching me.
12 year old: "I have no goals?my goal is to die. That's all I can think about".
14 year old: "My dad?sexually abused me?"
15 year old: "I feel like a blob. I am faceless. I have been rejected by my parents, and my peers. I'm ugly, I'm not fun, I'm nothing?I just want to find a place where I fit".
Has anyone ever told you that you're beautiful? 15 year old: "No. Never"
Maybe your mom will call...9 year old, tear rolling down his face: "She doesn't care enough to call".
16 year old, eyes to the floor: "I'm afraid to look people in the eyes?I am afraid they will see inside".
11 year old: "Well?I don't really have any friends."
These are just a fraction?a glimpse of the aching hearts and the pain that I have been coming into contact with on a daily basis. These kids are barely alive on the outside, and already dead and rotting on the inside. They have been rejected by the world. They have lived unfortunate lives. They have had no one to believe in them. They have been misunderstood, and they have been rejected, and they have been despised.
It seems that so many of my entries have a "depressing" attribute to them. But that is only to those who have closed their eyes to reality and responsibility. I understand, there are many smiling children in this world?but Christ has not come for the well, but for the sick. These are the sick and dying?and these are the people who I choose to open my eyes to?in my writing, and by the grace of God- in my life.
The pattern in my entries lately has been to focus on the people that have touched my life. These children have not only touched, but changed my life.
Broken hearts, their bleeding arms, their battered identities. Some come clothed in pink Abercrombie and Fitch, others come with 22 peircings, Nazi tattoos, and covered in black. All of them crying the same words:
WE HAVE TRIED THIS WORLD. ..AND IT HAS LEFT US EMPTY HANDED. WE HAVE TRIED THIS WORLD, AND IT HAS LIED TO US. WE HAVE TRIED THIS WORLD, AND WECAN TRY NO MORE?OR WE WILL DIE.
I am ashamed. I am ashamed not because I was the one to put them down, or to reject them. Not because I was mean or judgmental. Not because I was prideful or rude. No?no?not at all.
I am ashamed by my silence. I have not given my hand. I have not looked for those in need. I have been self-centered, and tangled up in "finding" my own identity. I have been too busy finding my "way" that I have failed to help the ones who are drowning and in need of a Savior.
For the words unsaid, for the encouragement held in, for the tears unwiped, for the hearts left broken, for the eyes I kept shut, for the ears that failed to listen, for the tears that were never shed, for the love that was withheld, for the joy that went unshared, for the hands that served self, for the Light that went covered.
I am ashamed.
Jesus said, "It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick." Matthew 9:12
Debra is currently a counselor at a local hospital, working with at risk youth. Her true passion lies in the urban community where she founded and runs an after school program for the local youth and is an active participant in the community. She is currently pursuing her Masters in Counseling.
car service from Midway Burlington .. Lockport Chicago limo O’HareDid you ever know somebody who easily accumulates wealth? If... Read More
I have been reading a lot lately about the concepts... Read More
Greetings my Dear Beloved SoulsWe have heard your cries, your... Read More
When the Tsunami struck Asia and East Africa on December... Read More
My thoughts can get a little edgy at night. Possibly... Read More
I come face to face with self whenever you come... Read More
It is my personal view that the reason we call... Read More
Matthew 3:7-10 John Rebukes the Pharisees and Sadducees7 But when... Read More
Woodstock, the watershed event for a generation, had a far... Read More
Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me,... Read More
As communion was being passed this morning, I listened to... Read More
Fanny J. Crosby's famous hymn, "Tell Me the Story of... Read More
(Channeled) Spirituality is about everyday life, which includes getting up... Read More
It has long been surmised that emotional trauma can lead... Read More
My lady Lydia was a Hawkins of the ancestry of... Read More
There is a natural tendency to asociate spirituality with religion,... Read More
"Let me take you down to a town called Paradise."Van... Read More
Spiritual growth is the process of inner awakening, and becoming... Read More
You decide! We are often asked to make decisions. Decision... Read More
The question isn't, "Is there life after death."Rather, the question... Read More
Let me explain my approach to the practice of ritual.... Read More
In the year 2000, I went on a mission trip... Read More
When we find spirituality, or it finds us, the experience... Read More
The second verse of Amy Grant's song, "Angels Watching Over... Read More
I was in the bank's vault. The Brink's armored truck... Read More
Granger limo Chicago ..Many may wonder what is God's will, or how do... Read More
The gate of every year is the begining of that... Read More
"I learned I was not, as most Africans believed, the... Read More
There's nothing wrong with wanting to improve ourselves either outwardly... Read More
One of the first issues people on the spiritual path... Read More
Before the movie "Finding Nemo", came out Steve Jobs the... Read More
What power do we hold individually in the midst of... Read More
"Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my... Read More
It is life, time for breathing deep, sighs and touching... Read More
We all have spirit guides and we all benefit from... Read More
Last week, I sat at my computer and watched the... Read More
When we feel that something has gone wrong and are... Read More
Your mind-body team is made up of your mind and... Read More
In today's world we worry about everything, food, jobs, clothing,... Read More
WHAT IS E.V.P.?EVP stands for electronic voice phenomena, some believe... Read More
What's a cosmic 2 x 4 you ask? It's actually... Read More
God made humans in his image but these days very... Read More
Tony was a professinoal salt-water fisherman. He explained how he... Read More
(Channelled)I have been trying to ignore this title "A Man... Read More
"He forgave us all our sins, having canceled the written... Read More
If we don't behave according to a specific church's doctrine,... Read More
My name is Had. You may know me, but you... Read More
What kind of foolishness is astrology? You read about Sun... Read More
Water of Enlightenment, Angel of Peace and Harmony for Nature... Read More
Since the beginning of time mankind has pondered, who God... Read More
Spirituality |