Home
>
Stress Management
>
FEAR: How to Defeat the Monster

FEAR: How to Defeat the Monster

What is the greatest fear of man? Is it death? Pain? Poverty? Physical ailments? Loneliness? Surveys tell us that the number one fear among modern people is public speaking, of all things!

What is fear? We all know what it feels like, but what exactly is it? The dictionary defines fear as "A painful emotion or passion excited by the expectation of evil, or the apprehension of impending danger; apprehension; anxiety; solicitude; alarm; dread; to be anxious or solicitous for." That sounds rather ominous, and it is. Now, what are we going to do about it?

Fear, however, can also be a positive emotion. Fear can also induce an adrenalin rush enabling us to rise to the demands of a particular situation. It could be the "extra" you need to run from the mugger, to sing in front of the crowd, to burst through the defensive line of the opposing team, to ask your boss for a raise and so on.

Fear manifests itself physically, often as a knot in the bottom of our stomach, as that tension headache in the lower region on the back of our skull, as subtle to massive perspiration levels across our bodies or dozens of other physical sensations. Is fear real? Sometimes, it is a result of very real and threatening circumstances, while at other times it is simply the resulting emotions caused by our apprehension and negative expectations concerning a certain activity, event or outcome. They feel the same however. Our bodies react in the same manner whether the fear is real or imagined.

Consider the acronym False Evidence Appearing Real. The letters spell fear, but what is the message? The obvious message is that whether or not the situation is real or imagined, our mind sees it as the same occurrence and our physical reaction is identical. Knowing this, we can now go to work.

Many years ago, Mark Twain said "Do the thing that you fear and the death of fear is certain." He was as exactly right then as he is for today, as truth never changes. I have found through personal experience that if you are fearful about a certain event or situation, there are steps that you can take to make it more logical and less emotional. In other words, identify the false evidence that is appearing real and you are on your way to reducing that situations' negative hold on you. Removing or reducing the negative emotion by identifying the false evidence will enable you to have the courage to do the thing that you fear.

For example, assume that you were called upon by your boss to do a three-month research project and present your findings and representations to the board. After you "outwardly and confidently" accept the assignment, your first gut reaction may likely be sheer panic! Right now, you are probably paralyzed with fear and shaken to the core. Where do you go from here? How on earth can you muster the fortitude to proceed?

Let's break down this project and look at it rationally. These same steps can be used with little modification to address a wide variety of circumstances. For the purposes of this paper, let's assume that you are quite capable of accumulating the data and extrapolating the results into a written report format and you now have concluded that portion of your assignment. What next?

1. Relax. Take a deep breath, hold for a 4 second count and exhale slowly. Repeat 4 times.

2. Close your eyes. Know that God gave you ample ability to do this. Be thankful.

3. On a blank sheet of paper, draw a line down the center so that you now have two columns.

4. Label column one as Positives and column two as Negatives.

5. Identify your negative emotions and write each one in the Negatives column. Write in detail as necessary. Clearly identify each feeling that you have relative to the assignment.

6. In the Positives column, write your strengths. Include your positive emotions. Examples: Do you have a pleasant voice? Is your work often complimented? Do people like you?

7. What are the likely outcomes from the assignment? Will you be promoted when you deliver your presentation? Will you receive a 20% salary increase? Will you literally die a horrid death if you deliver a poor presentation? Will they "boo" and heckle you in the boardroom? Be realistic. Examine the facts. What is the evidence supporting each possible outcome?

8. Identify the False Evidence Appearing Real. Does it look as threatening to you now in light of your recent analysis?

9. Study your audience. What do you know about each board member? Remember, they are also human beings just like you. They probably value their health and families too, just like you do. What types of presentations are they used to. What do they favor? Each board member's personal assistant can most likely answer these questions for you.

10. Plan your presentation. Make an outline using your expected time allotment. Determine which presentation tools, if any, that you will utilize. Do you need a drawing pad, a projector, a laptop or any other aid? Plan for all contingencies.

11. Rehearse your presentation several times until you are comfortable with it. Remember to do the thing you fear and the death of fear is certain. Rehearse again.

12. Remember, especially just before your actual presentation, that you and only you are now the expert on this particular subject within the confines of the boardroom. Be confident.

Remember what that famous 1960's-70's philosopher, "Broadway" Joe Namath, had to say in one of his commercials; "Look sharp, feel sharp? Be sharp." Broadway Joe understood how to advance in the face or fear or adversity. He must have read Mark Twain.

These principles, altered slightly to fit any given situation, will always take the sting out of fear. "Do the thing you fear and the death of fear is certain." That is absolute truth that does not change with the passage of time.

Daniel Sitter is the author of the breakthrough e-book, learning for profit, the revolutionary "how-to" book providing simple, step-by-step instructions to teach people exactly how to learn new skills faster than ever before. It is what the author calls a "skinny book", a new generation of e-book designed for busy people. Containing no "filler or fluff", it gets right to the point with no wasted time. It can be read easily and quickly on a computer, a PDA or printed for later reference.

Visit learning for profit or contact the author directly. This e-book is currently available from C|net's download.com, the authors' web site and a variety of online book merchants. Mr. Sitter is also a contributing writer for many online and traditional publications.

quick home cleaning Glenview ..

In The News:

Major Marquis fintech breach exposes 400,000-plus Americans' data through unpatched SonicWall vulnerability, with Texas hardest hit at 354,000 affected.

Free up iPhone storage fast by clearing large photos and videos from Messages app. Simple steps for iOS users to delete attachments without losing chats.

Scammers are flooding inboxes with fake tracking alerts that mimic real carriers, exploiting the holiday rush to steal logins and personal data.

The Fox News AI Newsletter brings you the latest news on AI technology advancements and the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.

Texas family reunites with missing 11-year-old cat Grayson after 103 days using Petco Love Lost's AI photo matching technology and community help.

Tired of AI customer service loops? These insider tricks help you escape "frustration AI" and get real human help when you need it most for urgent issues.

Unlock richer audio from your streaming apps with simple tweaks to volume normalization, equalizer settings, and quality preferences for cleaner sound.

Scammers are sending fake Facebook settlement payout emails that mimic legitimate notices from the privacy settlement administrator to deceive users.

Holiday shopping scams surge as fake refund emails target distracted consumers during Black Friday and holiday seasons, costing Americans billions annually.

The AI-powered IRMO M1 exoskeleton features four modes, including turbo, eco, training and rest for hiking, running, cycling and sports with eight-hour battery life.

OpenAI announced upgrades for its ChatGPT Images platform on Tuesday, saying the program can now make more precise edits and produce images more quickly.

Chrome for Android now turns web articles into AI-powered podcast conversations. Get hands-free browsing with Google Gemini's natural audio summaries.

LastPass faces $1.6 million fine from U.K. regulators after 2022 data breach exposed 1.6 million users. Password manager failed proper security controls.

Petco disclosed a data breach exposing customer Social Security numbers, financial account details, and driver's license information due to a software error.

Baseball teams can now analyze complete swing mechanics in normal training environments using Theia's markerless AI system that processes standard high-speed footage.

Smart home hacking fears overblown? Expert reveals real cybersecurity risks and simple protection tips to keep your connected devices safe from hackers.

MIT develops needle-free glucose monitor using light technology. Revolutionary device could replace painful finger pricks for diabetes management.

The ClickFix campaign disguises malware as legitimate Windows updates, using steganography to hide shellcode in PNG files and bypass security detection systems.

Researchers from Osaka Metropolitan University designed a 21-foot dome that combines aquaculture and hydroponics to create a self-sustaining urban food system.

The Fox News AI Newsletter gives readers the latest AI technology advancements, covering the challenges and opportunities AI presents.

ChatGPT data breach exposes personal info of users through partner Mixpanel. OpenAI confirms names, emails compromised in security incident.

Android rolls out Emergency Live Video for 911 calls, letting dispatchers see real-time scenes during emergencies. Great for holiday travel safety.

Malicious Chrome and Edge extensions collected browsing history, keystrokes and personal data from millions of users before Google and Microsoft removed them.

Google's new Call Reason feature lets Android users mark calls as urgent before dialing, displaying an urgent label to recipients using Phone by Google app.

Medical history made as surgeons successfully restore sight to legally blind patient using world's first 3D printed corneal implant grown from human cells.

FEAR: How to Defeat the Monster

Stress Management