Defending your point of view can use up a lot of your precious energy. As much as 90% of our available energy can be used in this way.
If you do this a lot, stop doing it and see for yourself. You'll probably feel energised, not to mention liberated.
Sometimes it's necessary to 'defend your view'. If someone is trying to persuade you to do something you don't want to do either walk away or say the minimum. Such as "No."
People respect a simple "no", as long as it's said with conviction. Or you can be polite and say "No thanks". Just leave out the "No, but..." as this leaves an opening for the persuader to get back in to try and 'convince' you.
An example is that an ex-partner always wanted me to go skiing. I hated it but he was always trying to persuade me of its merits. This resulted in many tiring arguments where I defended my views on why I disliked it and he defended his views on why he did.
It was exhausting, I felt as if I was in court and had to come up with a good reasons not to ski!
Finally I realised that all it took was a simple, but emphatic "No". He skied, while I enjoyed the apres ski without the ski...bliss!
If you're not defending your right not to do something that you don't want it's even easier. As soon as defending your view stops being pleasant then just stop.
I can remember a huge row that divided a group I met on holiday. It began as a lightheartded chat about a particular movie. It soon became a heated row. The people who liked it thought there must be something wrong with the people who didn't. And vice versa.
I'm not going to say what the movie was, I don't want to start another row! However, I arrived on the beach the next day day to find them all 'fuming' about this ongoing disagreement. They asked if I'd liked the movie. Actually I'd loathed it, but said it just hadn't appealed to me, and I hadn't really thought about why....
I wasn't going to say another thing...I'd learned by too many mistakes.
If they'd asked me in the heat of the row it would have been wise to say I hadn't seen it! After all, whatever they thought or said would not change the fact I hadn't liked it.
That's the crucial point. Nothing anyone said would have changed my experience of that film. People's views are more often changed by experience, rather than persuasion.
It doesn't matter if it's ice-creams, cars, clothes, holidays, that are being discussed.
You know what you like, you know what you don't like. And that's enough. The more we respect the point of view of others the more they respect ours.
Janet trained as a Professional Stress Consultant. She owns the website http://www.womens-natural-health.com which offers lots of free tips for enhancing your health, happiness and beauty.
car service from Midway Burlington .. Lockport Chicago limo O’HareThe best way to reduce your stress is to really... Read More
One of my favorite stories about change is the story... Read More
Today's workplace produces plenty of stress. Life's little hassles mount... Read More
Recently I completed some new workshop engagements in addition to... Read More
Whether we are at work, traveling, or at home, we've... Read More
... Read More
If you're like most people, you have your bouts of... Read More
Punch a pillowScream into a pillowTurn on your favorite music... Read More
In order to understand stress better, it is a good... Read More
Do you worry all the time?Do the following symptoms bother... Read More
There are two types of anxiety:*Situational *Existential.Most of us experience... Read More
Comedian George Carlin once remarked, "Have your ever noticed? Anyone... Read More
With how busy we keep ourselves on a day to... Read More
Question 1"How do I get more time to play?"Answer: Schedule... Read More
If you have never tried combining your breathing exercises with... Read More
One of the hardest forms of stress to avoid is... Read More
* The material presented in this article is provided for... Read More
One of the best ways to relieve yourself from the... Read More
Life can offer us many challenges having to do with... Read More
Stress seems to have become a constant factor in today's... Read More
Insomnia is usually the result of the modern way of... Read More
Loneliness and separation are the real illness of our times.... Read More
Many of my readers write to me about the tensions... Read More
When something happens in our lives, we automatically assess the... Read More
When was the last time that you truly took a... Read More
Granger limo Chicago ..Mark Twain once said, "It's not what we don't know... Read More
Most people know of the importance of exercise as a... Read More
But how can this happen to someone?Let's concentrate on how... Read More
In our article about Exercise & Stress, we looked at... Read More
This is the time for daydreaming about your annual vacation.... Read More
Have you recently moved or started a new job? Do... Read More
Author and speaker H. Stephen Glenn has said,"In terms of... Read More
Living in our world today can be very stressful. While... Read More
Marshal John Kruger acted by Arnold Schwarzenegger (who else) in... Read More
Rhodiola Rosea is the latest natural remedy to join the... Read More
Stress affects different people in different ways, but affect them... Read More
Matthew 11:28 Come unto me, all ye that labour... Read More
It is very true that, unfortunately, many people look to... Read More
Ask a hundred different people how to deal with stress... Read More
David Bowie once sang, "Ch-ch-changes, tryin' to face the strain."And... Read More
More than two-thirds of visits to doctors' surgeries are for... Read More
When Army leaders fail to control battlefield stress, they lose... Read More
Everyone experiences stress at some point in their life. In... Read More
There are two types of anxiety:*Situational *Existential.Most of us experience... Read More
Understanding StressStress has been called "the invisible disease". It is... Read More
I hear from many people that they see ever increasing... Read More
While free-lancing for business magazines, I was assigned to write... Read More
If you suffer from insomnia of any kind, the chances... Read More
CHICAGO - According to a recent article in the September... Read More
It was a self-exploration that made me understand myself. It... Read More
Stress Management |