Mark Twain once said, "It's not what we don't know that hurts us. It's what we know that isn't so."
At this point, you might be saying, "Wait a minute, if I believe I know something, doesn't that make it so?"
Well, yes and no. (That's a classic therapist answer, by the way.) The yes part is that in many ways, if we believe something, that can make it so for us. Henry Ford said, "Whether you believe you can or you believe you can't, you're right."
The no part is this - what if what you believe isn't accurate, is no longer true, or just isn't so?
I realize this might be a lot to think about with your morning coffee, but consider this - a belief is merely a feeling of certainty about something. Some beliefs enhance and expand our lives, such as "if it's possible in the world, it's possible for me."Other beliefs tend to limit and inhibit our lives. It's been my experience that we carry around many more limiting beliefs than we do enhancing beliefs.
Most, if not all, of our limiting beliefs can be divided into three categories; I am......, people are......., and the world is......."
I am.........People are..........
These limiting beliefs include our prejudices and influence how we see other people. Some of the most common are -
That's a man's/woman's job
Any kind of prejudice
People can't be trusted
Everyone is out for themselves
Nice guys finish last
People are too busy to care
The World Is..........
These limiting beliefs influence how we see the world and our position in it. Some of the most common are -
It's a dog-eat-dog world.
The world is a ghetto (oops, that's George Benson, just to jazz things up a little)
Society owes me a living.
The world is falling apart.
Do you recognize yourself in any of these limiting beliefs? Can you think of other beliefs that have limited you in the past or are limiting you now?
My purpose here is twofold. First, to get you to identify and begin to consider how certain beliefs have limited you. Second, to give you some tools for changing limiting beliefs into beliefs that can support and enhance your life.
Have you ever noticed that when you buy something new, such as a car, you begin to see that car everywhere? They were there before, it's just that now your focus has changed. It's the same way with limiting beliefs. They point our focus in a certain direction, and we can always find evidence to support them.
But other than getting to be "right", what good does it do? Our limiting beliefs continue to hold us back.
Here are three ways that you can begin to change limiting beliefs-
1) Begin to question them. Ask yourself, "Is this really true?" Would a camera, taking a picture, be able to support this belief?
2) Counter the belief. Sometimes, just saying and considering the opposite is enough to change the belief. For example, change "I'm too old" into "I'm just the right age to do what I want to do."
3) Redirect your brain. For example, ask yourself "In how many ways can I be happy now, have people care about me, has the world worked?" All of these are counters to the limiting beliefs listed above.
Our beliefs can either limit or enhance our lives. With the proper tools, the choice is then up to us. What will it be for you?
Visit secretsofgreatrelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.
Airbnb cleaning service Glenview ..My son was watching a Richard Scarry video this morning... Read More
Worry, big or small blocks positive vibrations from entering your... Read More
Governements and businesses have regularly highlighted the costs of stress... Read More
Everyone worries. As bothersome as it is, worry isn't all... Read More
It is very true that, unfortunately, many people look to... Read More
Breathing is the vital force of life. It is considered... Read More
It was a self-exploration that made me understand myself. It... Read More
There are times in every person's life when things do... Read More
To combat modern day stressors, you need to realize that... Read More
Punch a pillowScream into a pillowTurn on your favorite music... Read More
Among the hardest parts of living in the modern world... Read More
The right amount of stress can be good for you,... Read More
Deadlines at work, demanding bosses, bills to be paid at... Read More
So many of us live a stressful life. Unfortunately, when... Read More
One of the dumbest things I have ever done is... Read More
Have you ever said the words, "This job/my life is... Read More
WHAT THE RESEARCH SAYSExperts in the stress management field have... Read More
In a recent CMA survey of 2251 physicians, over 45%... Read More
Rhodiola Rosea is the latest natural remedy to join the... Read More
Who hasn't experienced "worry" at one time or another? Almost... Read More
I love a good story and I know I'm not... Read More
Adversity is an unavoidable part of life. Death of a... Read More
But how can this happen to someone?Let's concentrate on how... Read More
We so often take the feelings of happiness and saddness... Read More
We all know that stress levels in the workplace are... Read More
efficient cleaning crew Highland Park ..Elizabeth, 32, cried during anger management class as she told... Read More
Looking for mindfulness? Who ya gonna call?Try dialing M.It's easy... Read More
No this is not related to praying, this is how... Read More
I'm so excited that I have discovered this secret today.... Read More
File this one under the category of "watch your language."The... Read More
One question that is not asked enough by people under... Read More
One of the dumbest things I have ever done is... Read More
Stress is often seen as being unhealthy, but for some... Read More
Anyone who has ever worked knows that stress is part... Read More
Too much driving, too much shopping, too much rushing around,... Read More
When a great Zen Master returned to his country after... Read More
If you find symptoms of anxiety disorder in any of... Read More
Over the years I've collected scores of comics and cartoons... Read More
I am worried. I have been biting my nails for... Read More
Q: "My career, though very very stressful, is one that... Read More
Often, in today's fast paced world, we forget to take... Read More
The fast pace of life is taking toll on every... Read More
A little stress is good for us until it becomes... Read More
Stress management is a hot topic; stress-related illness and suffering... Read More
Meditation seems to have arrived in the mainstream of late,... Read More
These days, when people have become so conscious about what... Read More
One of the best ways to relieve yourself from the... Read More
To combat modern day stressors, you need to realize that... Read More
Modern stress is habitual, and is something that the vast... Read More
Of all the sources of stress in our lives, faulty... Read More
Stress Management |