Adversity is an unavoidable part of life. Death of a loved one, breakup of a relationship, malicious action by another, job loss, natural disaster, or any other undesirable event are all circumstances people encounter. Events happen that are beyond our control.
Successfully overcoming adversity is essential for a healthy life. Overcoming adversity builds mental strength, character and endurance. You develop in ways that would not otherwise be possible.
When undesirable incidents occur, you want to avoid the pitfall of the past and becoming mired in the would of, could of, or should of trap. It's done and over. Adversity is overcome by moving forward.
Nothing you can do, say, think or feel will ever change the past. Wallowing in feelings of guilt, regret or despair will diminish the present and compromise the future. Although it's difficult to accept unpleasant events, you have no choice, they have already occurred. The goal is to adjust your outlook to enable you to function and move ahead.
Adverse reactions are not unusual when faced with adversity. Feelings of denial, sickness, giving up, retribution, being overwhelmed, inactivity, anger, guilt, and "why me" are not uncommon. These reactions are counter-productive causing you to feel worse. Anger or bitterness poisons you and impedes your recovery.
You have control over your reaction to adversity. You have been conditioned by how others respond to unpleasant circumstances. However, most people aren't a good role model for effectively dealing with adversity.
Adverse situations can be divided into three categories; events you have no control or influence over, situations resulting from decisions you made, and circumstances caused by someone else's actions. Effort spent on lamenting the past drains you of energy needed to handle the present and plan for the future. Your energy is best spent ensuring that you will be OK.
After experiencing a loss, a period of grieving is normal but should not become a way of life. Everything in life is temporary. What varies is the timing. As much as you may miss someone, there are people who depend on and need you. Focusing on the needs of others is an effective and positive way to move forward.
Perhaps you are unhappy with the results from your decisions. Everyone makes bad calls. There are no "do-overs" -- life goes on. How do you get back on track? Learn from your experiences and keep going. Inaction will cause you to feel worse.
Channeling your energy into positive action is one of the best cures for being disheartened. For example, if you've lost a job, immediately begin the process of getting another one. No matter how bad unemployment is, the odds are always weighted heavily in your favor. Even if the unemployment rate was an astronomical 15% you have an 85% chance of finding a job.
If a relationship has ended without any chance of reconciliation, take comfort in the fact that there are numerous people in the same boat. Get out, circulate, and meet people.
If you've made a bad decision and are unhappy with your circumstances, resolve to change direction. Effecting a correction can be difficult, but persisting in an unhappy state is torture.
Everyone encounters adversity. No one is ever singled out. No one knows why some things happen, they just do. Some decide to regain their footing, catch their breath and keep walking forward. Others choose to give up.
Each time you overcome adversity you get stronger and wiser and can teach others by example how to do it also.
copyright 2005 Bryan Golden
Bryan Golden is a self-development and motivational expert, author, and adjunct professor. He is the author of "Dare to Live Without Limits," and writes a nationally syndicated newspaper column. For more information please visit: http://www.daretolivewithoutlimits.com or http://www.daretolivewithoutlimits.com
cheapest limo Akin .. Lockport Chicago limo O’HareStress is amazingly persistent, even seductive. We get used to... Read More
A stressless lifestyle? That's very easy to say. Yet it... Read More
STRESS & TIME MANAGEMENT: Stress is either the source or... Read More
Many people recognise the warning signs that stress may be... Read More
1. Determine your "unique ability" and capitalize on itDelegate the... Read More
Many of my readers write to me about the tensions... Read More
What do you think of when you see that word?... Read More
Work related tensions, personal issues and abnormal lifestyles are the... Read More
Elizabeth, 32, cried during anger management class as she told... Read More
I hear from many people that they see ever increasing... Read More
Many CEOs see stress as an intractable problem which would... Read More
Where does stress really come from? Is there any simple... Read More
If you're like most people, you have your bouts of... Read More
26 ways to minimize and manage the unhealthy effects of... Read More
Here's an amazing quote from Time magazine:"At birth a baby's... Read More
My work often deals with proactive, preventive means to Overcome... Read More
Stressed? Relax Right Now with 5 Super-Simple Stress-BustersStressed-out? Don't know... Read More
Do you have the desire for a stress free life?... Read More
Lake Hopatcong, NJ (PRWEB) November 30, 2004 -- Here are... Read More
In my experience, most of us spend a lot more... Read More
The World Health Organization calls stress "the health epidemic of... Read More
If you have never tried combining your breathing exercises with... Read More
Today's workplace produces plenty of stress. Life's little hassles mount... Read More
The best way to reduce your stress is to really... Read More
The Problem You don't need me to tell you how... Read More
Aledo wedding limo ..Don't let stress wear you down. Next time you are... Read More
Why do we resist change? As the saying goes, the... Read More
Case #1- Elizabeth, a 40 year old homemaker was always... Read More
Seems like more and more they are all around us.... Read More
There are times in every person's life when things do... Read More
The main problem in a down economy is that workplaces... Read More
CHICAGO - According to a recent article in the September... Read More
Ask a hundred different people how to deal with stress... Read More
Do you have stress in your life?......I know you answered... Read More
Stress is amazingly persistent, even seductive. We get used to... Read More
Q. I wonder if you could help me with a... Read More
Lake Hopatcong, NJ (PRWEB) November 30, 2004 -- Here are... Read More
ResentmentsA wise friend once said that holding onto resentments is... Read More
Stress is more than just unpleasant. It's dangerous. Try these... Read More
Loneliness and separation are the real illness of our times.... Read More
Get at least 15 minutes of sunshine daily.Daily Exercise -... Read More
Is your in-tray or inbox full? I don't normally check... Read More
Here's a fun little experiment:Take a few seconds and look... Read More
Part 1: Recognize the importance of family stress managementJoe and... Read More
But how can this happen to someone?Let's concentrate on how... Read More
I was a psychotherapist for... Read More
If you're like most people, you have your bouts of... Read More
If you've recently experienced loss or are going through a... Read More
Today's workplace produces plenty of stress. Life's little hassles mount... Read More
This summer, get away, without going away. Take a mini... Read More
Stress Management |