1. The Law of Everyone
It is not neccessarily wrong to get angry. You get angry, I get angry, all God's children get angry. It's what we do with our anger that makes the difference.
2. The Law of Stress
Although we don't often think of anger as a form of stress, it is by far one of the largest and most destructive forms of daily stress. Manage your anger, and you manage a large amount of your stress. 3. The Law of Choice
Anger is rarely if ever an automatic response. It's a choice. It's a choice because we have to think about something before we get angry.
4. The Law of Shoulds
We all have beliefs about how the world and the people around us should behave. When these beliefs are violated, anger is a natural, and sometimes reasonable response. The problem is that when we "should" on somebody, it can become a trigger for our anger.
For example, if we run the sentence "that driver should not have cut in front of me" over and over in our heads, the response is not likely to be pretty. At best we'll raise our blood pressure, and at worst do something really stupid.
5. The Law of Blame
Another one of our thoughts that lead quickly to anger involves blaming someone or something. The dance of blame is a deadly two step:
1) someone is at fault, and
2) they should be punished - anger can be very punishing.
6. The Law of Cause
This one is closely related to the law of blame. There is a myth in our culture that very few people ever question. The best example is the phrase "he made me angry."
Well, bull! No one can make us angry without our cooperation.
7. The Law of Emflaming
Another myth is that if we are able to vent our anger it will automatically decrease. That is not necessarily so. I once watched a neighbor stomp around the side of his house, grumbling and swearing as he went. Stomping by the air conditioning unit, he smashed his fist down on top of it. That move not only made him more angry, it looked to me like it hurt a lot too. Grumbling and swearing even louder, he stomps into his backyard and kicks a lounge chair. It didn't appear to calm him down, and it looked like that one hurt too. I found out later that he broke both his hand and his foot on his romp around the yard.
8. The Law of Source
In almost every case, anger is a secondary emotion. In other words, we experience some other strong emotion before we feel the anger. Follow the source and you usually come up with one of three strong emotions - fear, frustration or hurt, or some combination of the above. Deal with fear, frustration and hurt and you can cut anger off at the pass.
9. The Law of Battles
Learn to pick your battles. If you get angry at everything, then your anger means nothing. If that sounds confusing, here's an example: how much would gold be worth if we all had it in abundance? That's right, not much. Gold is valuable because it is so rare. If you are always getting angry, people stop taking you seriously and just want to avoid you.
10. The Law of Worth
Ask your self this question: "is this situation worth getting angry over?" Most time it just isn't.
11. The Law of Muscles
Learn to exercise your choice muscles.We can choose to be angry or we can choose another way of handling the situation.
12. The Law of Channeling
When you do get angry, channel it into something you can use to benefit you, such as motivating you into changing what can be changed.
Visit secretsofgreatrelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.
eco-friendly cleaning service Buffalo Grove ..* Play Romane's stress control seminar recordings, and read "The... Read More
My first real job (schedule, time clock, paycheck, boss) was... Read More
Author and speaker H. Stephen Glenn has said,"In terms of... Read More
Everywhere I go, I hear the same unpleasant sentence repeated... Read More
Meditation seems to have arrived in the mainstream of late,... Read More
This heading may seem like a contradiction in terms. How... Read More
Defending your point of view can use up a lot... Read More
It is very true that, unfortunately, many people look to... Read More
Q. I wonder if you could help me with a... Read More
1. Determine your "unique ability" and capitalize on itDelegate the... Read More
File this one under the category of "watch your language."The... Read More
"I've got too much to do, I've just got too... Read More
We all have it; we live with it daily: stress.... Read More
All people experience stress and anxiety in one form or... Read More
Voice: Bill!Bill: I thought I heard a voice.Voice: Bill! This... Read More
To be a safe and predictable person for those around... Read More
Traffic jams. Toddler tantrums. Deadlines at work. Money troubles. Too... Read More
Stress is normal. Stress is OK. Stress is the same... Read More
A little stress is good for us until it becomes... Read More
Did you know that taking a short trip, such as... Read More
Part 1: Recognize the importance of family stress managementJoe and... Read More
Top Ten Ways to Reduce Your Stress at Home1. Create... Read More
THE ENCHANTED SELF? teaches you how to access positive states... Read More
The main problem in a down economy is that workplaces... Read More
Do you feel tense and anxious at work? Do your... Read More
express cleaning service Arlington Heights ..Matthew 11:28 Come unto me, all ye that labour... Read More
When a great Zen Master returned to his country after... Read More
Are you a person who has a keen imagination, a... Read More
"One day I'm a mother, One day I'm a lover,... Read More
Stressed? Relax Right Now with 5 Super-Simple Stress-BustersStressed-out? Don't know... Read More
Marshal John Kruger acted by Arnold Schwarzenegger (who else) in... Read More
Stress is defined as a response by your body to... Read More
Looking for mindfulness? Who ya gonna call?Try dialing M.It's easy... Read More
I love a good story and I know I'm not... Read More
We are not designed for long term stress.It causes us... Read More
Stress seems to have become a constant factor in today's... Read More
Stress Vs PressureStress is something we all have, it's not... Read More
When September rolls around, does it generally hit you like... Read More
"I've got too much to do, I've just got too... Read More
Raise your hand if you have ever been rejected by... Read More
The World Health Organization calls stress "the health epidemic of... Read More
When something happens in our lives, we automatically assess the... Read More
So, you've recognised that you are suffering from stress and... Read More
Why Stress Management programmes don't work?It seems that every week... Read More
If you've recently experienced loss or are going through a... Read More
In the fast-paced world that we live in today, it... Read More
When it is all said and done, do you feel... Read More
Stress is often seen as being unhealthy, but for some... Read More
It is an inescapable fact, we live in a stressful... Read More
As we celebrate yet another Labor Day, I thought it... Read More
Stress Management |