We are repeatedly told that we should forget about unpleasant experiences (failures) and focus on pleasant ones (successes).
I agree totally with the last part of this proposition but only partly with the bit on forgetting about your unpleasant experiences.
Rather, I think unpleasant experiences must be confronted and "neutralized", otherwise they will always be lurking in your subconscious, ever ready to pounce upon you.
Don't delude yourself into thinking that they can simply and safely be swept under the carpet. Pull them right out and cut them down to size.
Clip their wings before they come back out to haunt you and poison your life.
These are ferocious little beasts that create pernicious feelings of guilt, anger, powerlessness leading straight to anxiety, depression and lowered self-esteem.
These are creatures of Darkness and nothing terrifies them as much as Light.
Pull them out and examine them in broad daylight and then you'll realize they are not as terrible as they seem.
In broad daylight, they melt away and become not just innocuous but even useful: they teach you lessons in what NOT to do.
And that is how you can learn from failure and turn negative experiences into positive, highly empowering lessons.
And "all's well that ends well"!
In the words of Dr. Jill Ammon-Wexler: "Every successful person throughout history has also faced and dealt with their own personal collection of fears and negative internal messages".
Anybody can do it!
Reserve some time to be by yourself or, better still, at night, before you fall off to sleep
1. Make a list of all your unpleasant experiences, all that you can remember, as far back as you can remember. Don't force yourself. Just take it easy
2. Carefully examine each one of those experiences and answer the following questions, as accurately as possible :
What happened exactly? Why? Where was it? When was it? How did it end? Why do you consider it as a negative experience? What might have been the consequences if it had ended otherwise (Envisage as many possible consequences as possible)? Don't you think things might have been worse if it had ended otherwise (Are you sure it wasn't a blessing in disguise, after all)?
3. After asking and answering all those questions, you'll find yourself relieved, as if a terrible weight had been lifted off your shoulders.
Your "negative experience" has now been reduced to its rightful size and rendered innocuous by being examined in the Light of Day. It will no longer come to haunt you.
4. From now on, you will do the same with even your most recent negative experiences and you'll soon feel that these will happen more and more rarely.
When you sit and examine your life, you'll see more and more success, less and less failure. You will carry out this exercise from time to time, maybe once a week.
5. Now get up and stand upright, Shake the dust of negative experiences off your clothes and move forward, fully aware that: You are the Maker and Owner of your Destiny.
So, why allow yourself to be ruled by your own creature and property?
Why keep worshipping a God you make with your own hands?
Focus on positive thoughts but also make sure you "neutralize" all negative thoughts!
A.M.Sall - author, coach, success mindset strategist
A 30+year experience - translator, teacher, traveler, musician, writer, plus crosscultural awareness, worldwide ancient spiritual traditions... Success Mindset Philosopher A.M.Sall helps you "be whatever you want to be and get whatever you want to get." http://www.health-beauty-wellness.com/negative.htm
monthly home cleaning Buffalo Grove ..Understand and apply this one secret to your own life,... Read More
1. Open your mind to new ideas: Positive behavior change... Read More
A More Effective WayI own a stack of self improvement... Read More
I have often been asked the question, "What is true... Read More
A young girl opens a birthday card from her grand... Read More
Back in my early marketing days, finding the magic ticket... Read More
Commit yourself to spending time only with people who are... Read More
Success is a word that is much used in our... Read More
You're considering a new career, new place to live or... Read More
(Excepted from the book The Five Major Pieces to the... Read More
Your Head, think about what you want and move towards... Read More
Most dictionary entries would define failure as the simple lack... Read More
Just how powerful is the Subconscious Mind and how can... Read More
Three key words to remember: weigh, count and measure. Now,... Read More
On March 27th 2005, Oxford won the annual boat race... Read More
You've been searching for self improvement or personal development. Trying... Read More
(excerpted from the Day That Turns Your Life Around)After having... Read More
Why everything has to be so hard? What have I... Read More
Find a higher reason to reach your goal than just... Read More
We own a home on the island of Puerto Rico... Read More
I recently was made aware of two comparative statistics that... Read More
Wealthy people share common traits. That's why they are wealthy.... Read More
You already have all the resources you need to accomplish... Read More
Here are 3 powerful steps you can take to free... Read More
I bet you want to be wealthy, but somehow the... Read More
scheduled maid service Mundelein ..On March 27th 2005, Oxford won the annual boat race... Read More
One of the greatest compliments I ever received in my... Read More
Want more success in your business or professional life? Here's... Read More
In terms of life success, there are four pretty obvious... Read More
McDonald's does it, why shouldn't you? Life is filled with... Read More
No one wants to fail. But when in business you... Read More
One way to become more successful in your life is... Read More
As kind of a hobby I like to watch people.... Read More
Let's say you're moving forward in your efforts to achieve... Read More
Have you ever noticed when playing a video game, or... Read More
Have a therapeutic meltdown It's crunch time: you're two days... Read More
Does the thought of failure send a cold shiver down... Read More
Be weary and leery when it comes to standardized tests... Read More
As a speaker and trainer, people often approach me after... Read More
It is high time you know the truth about yourselves.... Read More
In his audio e-book, 10 Habits to Swell Your Bank... Read More
Much has been researched, written and taught about success. One... Read More
Absolutely no one can underestimate the power of the mind... Read More
Hello everybody and a good day (or night !) to... Read More
Recently, I coached a young woman whom I'll call Mary... Read More
An old fable tells about a religious man and a... Read More
You must understand You are already a Success, and before... Read More
What is a champion really? Sure, all success oriented people... Read More
You can be a master achiever by developing the same... Read More
Choose "impossible" goals When faced with a hard-to-reach goal, your... Read More
Success |