After 13 years of being married to the same woman and working for the same employer, I had a crisis in motivation. My marriage, ended in an unmitigated emotional and financial disaster. In short order, my career path went awry as I was 'reorganized' out of a job. My life seemed to be a study in chaos and failure. I felt somehow cheated. At 38, I was too young to quit, but felt too old to start over. I'd strived to be the devoted husband, model citizen, the ?ber employee. Still, I lost. Or did I? How was I measuring success? Weren't my efforts to be my best worthwhile? These are questions most of us will struggle with a few times in our lives. How we answer them will either fuel us for further progress or immolate us in a bonfire of self defeatism.
Dan Marino never won a championship. In pee wee, high school, college, or professional football, 'Dan the Man' never won it all. How is that possible that the greatest quarterback ever to pick up a football retired without "the ring"? How in the cosmic order, could a person excel so well at what he does and come up empty-handed? How then, can success or greatness be defined?
"It's not whether you win or lose, it's how you play the game." To anybody who's ever really competed in anything, that aphorism is as hollow as a jack-o-lantern. We all want to win. We're hardwired for it. The traditional model of winning always involves direct competition. Today, though, 'winning' has morphed into beating countless, faceless 'others' in anything--having the hottest relationship, most impressive title, or the most money in the bank.
The truth is, however, we all don't get to drink from the victors' cup. This reality should encourage us to consider motivations that transcend besting others.
Personal excellence is a more consistent and accessible motivator because it comes from within. Achieving excellence in the pursuit of our goals isn't about the mark others set. Excelling is about us reaching our own best marks. When you excel, you win the only game worth playing.
When I was 22, I was with presented a definition of success that forever changed my outlook. "Success is the progressive realization of worthy goals." How revolutionary! You mean that I wasn't a success only when completed to goal, but while I still was attaining it? This meant for me that success was no longer tied to winning the race, or even finishing it. Success and winning were about running the best race that I could.
Could it be that easy? Why not? You can have abundance and joy in your life by setting your bar as high as you can dream and excelling at your own game. There's no competition, but infinite rewards. By this personal standard, I had two successful 13-year runs. The marriage may have ended, but I stayed committed and remain a loving father and loyal friend. The career my have taken a surprising turn, but I added value to the organization and still do my work and serve my customers with distinction. Score: Me:2 Other People's Standards: 0. Game. Set. Match.
Most football fans know that Dan "the Man's" records will last the ages. When asked what drove him to play so well for so long, his answer was simple and profound. He loves to throw balls. The actual act of launching a ball the best he could was his greatest motivator. It's amazing what towers we can build from the most humble of stones. When we pursue our passion, we find our purpose and become great along the way. The world may never see it, but we become champions nonetheless, enshrined forever in the halls of destiny.
David L. Cole is a speaker, trainer, and writer who empowers people seeking personal excellence, professional distinction, and positive social change.
He earned a Masters Degree in Educational Leadership and spent 13 years as a higher education professional. Currently he provides principle-based training through keynotes, workshops, and coaching. David helps individuals, organizations, and communities enhance their roles as scholars, leaders and citizens.
You can find out more about his work at http://davidlcole.com
You can reach David at http://davidlcole.com
tidy up service Glenview .."Well, you're just a busy beaver, aren't you?" You've either... Read More
Here are seven essential keys to success. Use these ideas... Read More
If you're so smart, why ain't you rich?Becoming a millionaire... Read More
I receive several emails every week asking me about how... Read More
Those of you who know me, know that I am... Read More
Have you ever made plans in your career but never... Read More
Step 1 ? Learn a powerful key to increase financial... Read More
Everybody wants to get to the top, whether it is... Read More
Here are 3 powerful steps you can take to free... Read More
Don't expect results over night - what??If you were to... Read More
If you called my office you will hear my voice... Read More
Having clear goals and desires for our future, and planning... Read More
"When I think back on all the crap I learned... Read More
Dare to Dream~It is said that every person has at... Read More
When you are in business every person you hire gets... Read More
Adults, with eyes to see, can learn so much about... Read More
The very first "motivational speaker" I heard as an adult... Read More
I always say to my children, as long as you... Read More
It is often said that the only things in life... Read More
Before we can unlock human potential, we need to know... Read More
Anytime you are making ground and moving toward success, there... Read More
Have you failed before and wished the earth could open... Read More
Dr. Wayne Dyer published his best-selling book, "10 Secrets for... Read More
'No man is an island' the saying goes. The implication... Read More
The most important quality you can ever develop is having... Read More
maid service near Winnetka ..Have you ever had such thoughts like "I always fall... Read More
Because Not All Skills Are Equal?Public Speaking MasteryHello,Tom Cruise is... Read More
Personal power is an INSIDE JOB. It doesn't mean getting... Read More
As a professional speaker, father and business owner I often... Read More
Use birthdays and other gift-giving holidays to help reach your... Read More
Those of you who know me, know that I am... Read More
You've tried and failed. You've watched others fall. You're wiped... Read More
Routinely, I rise out of bed before the birds, and... Read More
It goes without saying that we are unlikely to experience... Read More
Many people consider reading books a waste of time. It... Read More
Daddy was a very, very odd little man-possibly a schizophrenic-for... Read More
There is a difference but what constitutes a life... Read More
You must understand You are already a Success, and before... Read More
If you are sick and tired of the dreaming phase... Read More
If you're so smart, why ain't you rich?Becoming a millionaire... Read More
Did you know you can literally program your mind so... Read More
Do you think you have an "average" or perhaps an... Read More
What do you need to do to be successful? If... Read More
OK, so here we are. We've switched the calendars out... Read More
Being busy has become a way of life for many... Read More
Study hard, get good grades and you will have a... Read More
The very first "motivational speaker" I heard as an adult... Read More
Imagine you are a fire. Fires burn at different levels... Read More
Thoughts move faster than the speed of light.Expectations jump faster... Read More
What do you need to have for a successful business?... Read More
Success |