On your journey to moving past using food to cope with life's difficulties, you will experience good days and bad days. It takes a lot of work to develop self-compassion and much practice utilizing new ways of thinking and acting. It is my belief that what is commonly referred to as "relapses" or "set-backs" are not a step back in time, but an important experience needed to gain new understandings and to strengthen new choices.
When a "relapse" does occur it does not happen spontaneously, but occurs with a process of thoughts, ideas, attitudes, emotions and behaviors. Meaning that a series of circumstances occur which progressively lead to choosing food as a coping mechanism. A person doesn't suddenly find themselves overwhelmed by the need for food. There are warning signs along the way. These warning signs show up in mental thoughts and attitudes, physically felt emotions, and expressed behaviors and actions. Relapse warning signs often build up slowly until they become overpowering. Once they are overpowering, you may experience a loss of control of thinking, emotions, memory, judgement and behavior. Often, we have not taught ourselves to be aware of our warning signs. And if you are not aware that you are headed down a slippery slope, it may be too late when you find yourself at the bottom.
Therefore, it is important to find a way to recognize and monitor your relapse warning signs. If you are prepared and recognize the pattern that is happening, you can be more empowered the next time. Relapse is usually caused by a combination of factors. Some possible factors and warning signs are included in the list below:
APPETITE Increase in obsessive thinking about food and weight Sudden increase or decrease in appetite Weight gain or loss Skipping meals Eating only 'diet' foods Food 'rules' become more pronounced
SOCIAL INTERACTION Isolating Withdrawn behavior Not relying on people for support Change in sleep patterns Difficulty sleeping or sleeping too much Loss of daily structure
MEDICATION Use of alcohol Use of mood altering chemicals Increase in smoking, cigarettes, caffeine Numbing out with excessive shopping, sex, busyness, internet, etc. Excessive exercise
HOSTILITY Verbal or physical threats Desire to hurt self or others Angry outbursts Destruction of property
APPEARANCE Decreased personal hygiene or self-care Increased use of make-up Bizarre dreams Daily weighing Excessive exercising
THOUGHT PROCESS Perfectionistic attitudes Setting unrealistic goals Believing you will be happy and successful if thin Feeling of being "too fat", even though people say otherwise Obsessive thinking Dwelling on past hurts, resentments, anger, or failures Being too hard on yourself Forgetting gratitude Feeling disgusted after eating Trouble concentrating or thinking clearly Difficulty remembering things Confused or distracted Wanting to escape from stressful situations instead of dealing with them
MOOD Exhaustion Tearfulness Irritability Unusual or unprovoked anxiety Feeling hopeless about work, relationships or life Depression Feeling powerless or helpless Self-pity Complacency Conscious lying / dishonesty Loss of self-confidence Loneliness Frustration Anger Tension Disappointment, shame, guilt Constant boredom - irritability - lack of routine Feeling overwhelmed - confused - useless -stressed out
SUICIDE Thoughts of suicide Preoccupation with death Devising a suicide or self-harm plan Self-destructive behavior Cutting Feeling that nothing can be solved Wishing something would magically happen to rescue you
A relapse rarely happens suddenly. We can teach ourselves to notice the progressive warning signs that lead to a relapse in our behavior. Most people have never been taught to identify and manage the warning signs, so they don't notice them until the pain becomes to severe to ignore. If you can learn to identify your warning signs, you may be able to intervene early and keep symptoms from escalating. Use this form to circle your relapse signs, or write a list of personal warning signs that lead you back into your food patterns. By identifying things that put us at risk for relapse, developing a practical plan of action, and utilizing various new skills, tools and coping behaviors, we can empower ourselves and reduce the frequency of lapse back into our addictive behaviors. If and when a relapse does occur, do not judge or blame, you are not a bad person. Seek progress, understanding and compassion, not perfection.
COMMON TOOLS TO HELP IN A TIME OF CRISIS:
Regular journaling to monitor progress Regular journaling for gratitude Attending support meetings or OA Reaching out by telephone (print a list of people to call ahead of time) Prayer or meditation seeking guidance Reading inspiration books or poems A written plan of action A written list of things to do when symptoms increase or cravings begin Relaxation techniques Deep breathing exercise Helping others Talking to friends or counselors
(For more ideas on tools to utilize during a crisis, see articles posted at www.LovingMiracles.com under the "Healing Articles" section of the website).
By Dr. Annette Colby, RD
annette@annettecolby.com For FREE inspirational newsletter, articles & info visit: annette@annettecolby.com Copyright 2005, Dr. Annette Colby, all rights reserved. "Opening Creative Portals to Success"
no-contract cleaning service Mundelein ..Most of my clients had a vision of the contribution... Read More
Is it possible to get rich quick using the power... Read More
Pain. All of us have felt that emotion some time... Read More
For every disciplined effort, there are multiple rewards. That's one... Read More
Smile brings beauty to your face, charm to your personality... Read More
Identity theft!We've all seen them. The commercials use the voices... Read More
Unfortunately we come into contact with negativity everyday. We can't... Read More
Friendly competition Get together with a group of like-minded friends... Read More
You have probably heard the term "IQ" many times, and... Read More
My mentor, when I was 25 years old, dropped a... Read More
"If you can tell the world who you are and... Read More
The recent mission of the space shuttle Discovery is NASA's... Read More
If you have read this far, we both know you... Read More
Human beings are visual creatures. Our imaginations are powerful tools... Read More
Your own pressing needs, your long-standing frustrations, would benefit tremendously... Read More
Circus trainers used to tie a chain around a baby... Read More
I remember, about 35 years ago, reading two books by... Read More
There are certain laws that when obeyed will bring great... Read More
You talked but didn't get a response. You talked but... Read More
There's always a first time to meeting people. We want... Read More
There are "How to" seminars on virtually every business topic.... Read More
IF and WHEN were friends. Every week they met and... Read More
If it comes to the question what we really want... Read More
Most people want to be successful in life. But success... Read More
Several years ago, I attended a "success" seminar in northern... Read More
maid service near Glenview ..Today I feel inspired that I should speak more to... Read More
"All the adversity I've had in my life, all my... Read More
Does your life feel less than fulfilling? Are you waiting... Read More
Conditions differ from circumstances. Circumstances are changeable conditions which merely... Read More
Hello again! I have some more useful tips you can... Read More
People like to emerge as winners by hook or crook... Read More
Jim Rohn, the success guru and mentor, said, "Failure is... Read More
To realize that you determine the outcome of your own... Read More
Have you been struggling for years to accomplish some goals... Read More
If you are looking for a surefire strategy to ensure... Read More
In a recent article (What is The Ultimate Lifestyle), I... Read More
I've been coaching for a few years now, and the... Read More
Have you ever had this feeling? You're standing in front... Read More
What does "Lessons from My Garden" have to do with... Read More
J. Paul Getty appeared to be incredibly lucky, but it... Read More
"The secret of success is to make what you are... Read More
I receive several emails every week asking me about how... Read More
Opportunity is all around us and has many facets, but... Read More
Do you feel like your stuck?No matter what you do,... Read More
What is an ANT? An ANT is an acronym for... Read More
I received an advanced copy of a book called How... Read More
The HungryIn May of 2005 there were over 2 million... Read More
Here are 10 of 26 proven strategies gleaned from interviews... Read More
What characteristics are common among successful people. If you analyze... Read More
Want to be successful in whatever it is you choose... Read More
Success |