Re-defining Success in Midlife

When entering second adulthood, many women will begin a journey of re-defining personal and professional success for themselves. In midlife, success takes on a new meaning than it had in our 20's and 30's when it was most likely being defined more by others, the current culture, the past, hope or advertising. Our forming of new, revised, more authentic definitions of success are a reflection of our wiser, deeper, more experienced selves which sets us free to enjoy our life and work more completely because we are no longer defined or boxed in by outside influences. There is a sense of release from priorities that are no longer relevant or meaningful.

Around the time we enter our 40's, we have a deeper understanding, knowing and feeling of our innate self worth and that it is separate from the societal ideal of worth. We begin the shift to having a healthier, more deserving sense of responsibility around success, money and happiness and, as a result, have an opportunity to begin a new cycle of attraction and abundance in our lives. What can trip us up, if we are not aware of it, is when our old beliefs remain in silent opposition to the new sense of value and worth we are feeling as we begin the process of re-defining success. Our often unconscious beliefs are firmly held opinions we adopted from our past experiences and dictate how we assign meaning to our life and our expectations of how our life and/or work will be, either limiting or expanding our possibilities.

For example, one client I had held in her a belief that although she was excellent at what she did and she believed she could provide great value and benefit to others, she also believed she would probably not make enough money in her business to sustain her. She had based this thought on a number of things, including: The belief that she could not possibly earn a lot of money doing what she loved to do-the two just weren't synonymous in her mind; the belief that there had to be a sacrifice involved if a person wanted to earn a lot of money; and the belief that women in general don't have what it takes to be financially successful.

My client was obviously limiting her possibilities because of her limiting beliefs and their obvious mismatch to her evolving definition of success!! She had to shift her old beliefs if she was going to find the success she needed in order to continue doing what she wanted and loved to do! An exercise I use with clients to help them re-define their personal definition of success is to complete the sentence, "I know I am being successful by how??" And keep writing until they make sure that their new definition is phrased in such a way that they feel a tingle in their body, or the light bulb goes on or they feel really excited.

When my client did this exercise, her definition of success was "I know I am being successful by how easy it is to attract customers who can benefit from the unique gifts and talents I have to share." This statement caused her to challenge and bring to full consciousness the error of her old beliefs, allowing her to relax into her personal power and easily earn all the money she needed to sustain her business and live comfortably. Her new definition became the frame work for the process of re-working her old beliefs and creating new beliefs that served her and supported her by prompting new standards and goals that to a financially successful business that provided her with a new level of freedom and certainty vs. the angst and struggle she previously experienced.

We attract abundance when believe we are worthy regardless of outside forces trying to convince us otherwise. As a result, we attract even more abundance because we automatically raise the bar on our inner personal standards. For example, we might stop accepting credit card debt, we might require ourselves to work smarter instead of harder, we might start taking better care of ourselves because we love ourselves and not because we feel shamed by societal standards, we might start to stand up for ourselves more and we might create and follow through on more effective goals.

Entering this new cycle, we surprisingly find our feeling of personal success and value stops depending so much on the "doing", such as earning a certain amount of money, having a certain amount of power, or acquiring enough praise and recognition, but begins to have more to do with "being". The quality of the person we want to be, the lives we touch and the relationships we share. Which brings us back to this interesting twist regarding success; If we believe we are always enough just as we are, or who we are choosing be, rather than what we are doing (accumulating money, things and accomplishments), then, ironically, we attract more of the outer abundance we also desire!

Deb Betterly, Ph.D., is a personal and transformational coach who works with midlife women to help them bring spirituality, universal truths and connectedness to their lives and work environments. Deb's life coaching business offers self?directed programs, group coaching, and one on one focus coaching. She is also the author of an eBook called "Awakening the Spirit Within to Create Your Best Life" which can be found on her website, http://www.amazingjourneycoach.com

efficient cleaning crew Northbrook ..
In The News:

Viral video shared by Elon Musk shows Tesla's Optimus humanoid robots performing tasks from cooking to construction, garnering over 58.5 million views on social media.
Chinese hackers used Anthropic's Claude AI to launch autonomous cyberattacks on 30 organizations worldwide, marking a major shift in cybersecurity threats.
Apple's new Sleep Score feature gives you a rating for your nightly rest quality. Learn how to set it up on your Apple Watch and iPhone today.
Essential phone settings to enable before losing your device, including Find My network, location services and security features for iPhone and Android.
The Fox News AI Newsletter gives readers the latest AI technology advancements, covering the challenges and opportunities AI presents.
Cybersecurity research shows weak passwords remain a major threat, with simple patterns and number sequences putting millions of accounts at risk.
New Android malware BankBot YNRK silences phones, steals banking data and drains crypto wallets automatically. Learn how this advanced threat works.
FDA approves first human trial for Paradromics' brain-computer interface that could restore speech for paralyzed patients through neural technology.
New phishing platform QRR targets Microsoft 365 users across 1,000 domains in 90 countries. Learn how to spot fake login pages and protect your accounts.
OpenTable now uses AI to track your dining habits and share insights with restaurants. Learn what data they collect and how to protect your privacy.
Google's discontinued Nest thermostats still secretly upload home data to company servers despite losing smart features, raising serious privacy concerns.
New Android malware NGate steals NFC payment codes in real-time, allowing criminals to withdraw cash from ATMs without your card. Learn protection tips.
DoorDash confirms data breach exposing customer names, emails, addresses after social engineering attack. Learn how to protect yourself from scams.
Concerned about Google's AI scanning your Gmail? Learn how to disable Gemini features that access your emails, Drive files and Chat messages for privacy.
Google warns Android users about dangerous fake VPN apps hiding malware that steals passwords, banking details and personal data from phones and tablets.
Apple's digital passport feature lets iPhone users breeze through TSA checkpoints this holiday season using Digital ID technology at 250+ airports.
A new phishing scam targets family photos with fake "Cloud Storage Full" alerts. Criminals steal credit card information through fake sites. Learn protection tips.
South Korean scientists create ultra-thin fabric muscles that turn clothes into robotic assistants, lifting 33 pounds while weighing under half an ounce.
Archer Aviation has acquired Hawthorne Airport for $126M to launch an LA air taxi network ahead of the 2028 Olympics, featuring AI-powered eVTOL operations and next-gen aviation tech.
Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.
Fake AI apps disguised as "ChatGPT" and "DALLĀ·E" are flooding app stores with dangerous malware that steals data and monitors users without detection.
Fake buyers demand specific vehicle reports from unknown sites to steal credit card information from car sellers, but warning signs can help identify these scams before paying.
Android users can now manage apps across multiple devices more easily with Google Play Store's updated remote uninstall button in the latest update.
NASA's Perseverance rover discovers shiny metallic rock on Mars that could be a meteorite from an ancient asteroid, containing high levels of iron and nickel.
Holiday scams spike during Black Friday and Cyber Monday as criminals exploit your leaked personal data. Learn how to protect yourself from fake stores and phishing.

Hey Bozo, Forget Logic and Kiss This!

I want to relate to you a story, READ it... Read More

Success is a 6 Letter Word

Let me ask you a question? What must happen for... Read More

Awaken to Something New in Your Life: Conscious Change

What do we want most from life? Certainly, we all... Read More

Still Mourning That Business Failure!

No one wants to fail. But when in business you... Read More

The Role of Failure in Success

Does the thought of failure send a cold shiver down... Read More

Freedom In Starting Over

The story that is being used to illustrate the concepts... Read More

Top 10 Secrets to Success

Much has been researched, written and taught about success. One... Read More

The Art of Adapting to Change

One of the main reasons that may hinder us from... Read More

Self-Development Through Asking Why?

The Enlightened Warrior's 'Keys to Success' Through the Power of... Read More

Identify and Remedy Work Addiction

Work addiction is an unrestrained, unfulfillable internal demand for constant... Read More

The Importance of Listening Skills for Self Improvement and Success

Effective listening is almost certainly the most important communication skill,... Read More

Success: What Are You Afraid Of?

What are your fears? Fear of failure? Fear of success?What... Read More

Individualistic Sucess Models

In individualistic success models, success is not due to the... Read More

Techniques to Help e-Learning

e-Learning is doubling yearly. Classes, e-courses, e-books on how-to and... Read More

It is a Challenge to Succeed

(excerpted from The Challenge to Succeed audio series)It is a... Read More

Let It Be You

Each and every day, there are people all around the... Read More

How Important is Your Lemonade Stand?

When my neighbor's child was about 8, he decided that... Read More

Candleburning 101

One of the questions that I am asked most often... Read More

Why the Elephants Dont Run

A number of years ago, I had the rather unique... Read More

Success Through Discipline - The Rewards Of Discipline

Many of the problems we have with discipline are caused... Read More

Winning: Defining It - Achieving It

If you ask most people whether they would like to... Read More

Potholes On The Road To Success

Howdy folks, today I would like to speak to you... Read More

Success Lessons From Tennis That Can Change Your Life

Most sports are full of lessons for the discerning. Tennis... Read More

Fantasy Versus Reality

Building wealth isn't something for the frightened, ignorant, and lost.... Read More

No Shortcut To Success

Sometimes short cuts are not worth taking. They may bring... Read More

cleaning lady near Wilmette ..