Fear, or negative anxiety, is the modern day bubonic plague, infecting millions upon millions of people. It spreads with viral effect, and leaves behind consequences of mediocrity and regret. This "plague" is partly due to societal influences (particularly in a post-9/11 era) and partly due to individual issues (the tendency to avoid confrontation of that which we fear). However, whatever the cause, a vaccine is available, and it takes the form of moving towards that which we are most afraid of. Immediately.
Fear as an acronym stands for "False Evidence Appearing Real". This false evidence can take many forms, but the key is that it appears real. We perceive something to be scarier than it really is. One good example can be found in sports, when we fear losing (or failing). Think about it: Is there really anything to be scared of? If you do in fact lose, what then will happen? Sure, it might be painful, but hasn't everyone lost at one point or another in competition? Of course! So why fear losing if it happens to everyone? Not only is fear of losing or failure a waste of time-it also puts you in a reactive, more passive mode of competing. Reactive, passive competitors are more likely to perform poorly in a competitive environment. So don't waste your time fearing losing. Instead, spend your time:
1. Identifying your biggest fears (in sport, in competition, in life). These are the fears that hold you back the most. Fear of failure, fear of success, fear of injury, fear of risk taking.
What are the consequences of harboring some of these fears?
-Fear of failure: you will never fully give all of yourself to competition if you are afraid of losing
-Fear of success: you're less likely to win, obviously, if you have mixed emotions about being able to deal with success (and the responsibilities that come with it)
-Fear of injury: you're more likely to be injured, as you will be more tentative
-Fear of risk-taking: you'll never risk, and therefore, never gain.
2. Setting about a plan to attack these "falsehoods". Without a plan, there is no prescription for removal of these fears.
Dr. Smith's prescriptions:
-For fear of failure: Go out and fail on a daily basis. Get used to it, because humans do fail, and you are human. Might as well learn to live with it.
-For fear of success: Get straight in your mind that success is a great alternative to mediocrity. Really.
-For fear of injury: Get back on the bull (so to speak) as soon as possible after being injured (but cleared to compete). The longer you wait, the greater your fear will be.
-For fear of risk-taking: take risks, but on a large and frequent scale, and in every area of your life. Ask people out on dates. Ask for favors. Tell someone who is bugging you how you really feel. Ask a sport psychologist for assistance. (Just kidding, but not really!)
3. Moving towards instead of away from these fears. You will discover that the closer you move towards that which you fear, the less scary those fears are. Sort of like the first time you stood up to the school bully and realized that he or she was not so tough when confronted. You were perceiving based on "false evidence".
Moving towards fear in your daily life means doing that which you hate/detest/fear/loathe/don't want to do, and doing that thing first, before all else. For me, that means going jogging at 7 am on these dark, winter mornings. For you it might mean something else. However, the key to beating back our irrational and disabling fears is to run, not walk, towards them at every chance. By doing so, you will prove to yourself how silly those fears are in the first place, as they provide no inherent value in your life. They merely hold you back from reaching your true potential.
Copyright (2003) Leif H. Smith, Psy.D. All rights reserved.
Performance expert Leif H. Smith, Psy.D, is the president of Personal Best Consulting, a consulting firm located in Hilliard, Ohio. To learn more tips and techniques to immediately improve performance in your life and to sign up for his FREE monthly advice newsletter, visit http://www.personalbestconsulting.com
car service from Midway Burlington .. Lockport Chicago limo O’HareMany years ago, forty to be exact, I started my... Read More
We experience failure directly or indirectly. Here we will come... Read More
"Things might have been worse"This is the most powerful, dynamic,... Read More
Sometimes it is better to just get on with doing... Read More
Skills or beliefs; this may well be another example of... Read More
Step 1: List all the business activities that you complete... Read More
This morning, on TV, I was amazed to see how... Read More
Courage is something that is reflected and reciprocated, and is... Read More
This summer (2005) huge crowds in England and Australia have... Read More
Each human being, who exists above the level of simple... Read More
How do you land your dream job, win... Read More
Whenever I'm feeling stuck in a rut, I go out... Read More
What with the millions of words printed every day about... Read More
Clown around Among the Plains Indians, heyoka, or sacred clowns,... Read More
Recently I stumbled across a list of Microsoft Interview questions... Read More
The HungryIn May of 2005 there were over 2 million... Read More
Many of the problems we have with discipline are caused... Read More
How many people do you hear complaining about their job,... Read More
Let me ask you a question? What must happen for... Read More
It's really all we have... the "Moment". Think about it,... Read More
One of the greatest compliments I ever received in my... Read More
The ultimate expression of life is not a paycheck. The... Read More
I've been thinking a lot about what I believe to... Read More
There is a saying that goes something like this: Getting... Read More
I was talking about my business to a stranger the... Read More
Granger limo Chicago ..The entrepreneur game is filled with an amazing variety of... Read More
What would happen if you lived your life by design... Read More
How do we define success? Webster's dictionary defines success as... Read More
Often just one self-help principle can increase your power to... Read More
I was at a dinner party the other night when... Read More
You have a choice today?You can remain in the same... Read More
An effective self- concept generates the desire to strive for... Read More
Since December 1st 2004, I have written one article or... Read More
"Fighting to pay the bills is hardly worth it? fight... Read More
Feeling overworked and underpaid? If you're starting to feel like... Read More
In this article we mention 7 tips for your success.... Read More
Friendly competition Get together with a group of like-minded friends... Read More
The HungryIn May of 2005 there were over 2 million... Read More
As kind of a hobby I like to watch people.... Read More
Energy and persistence conquer all things. - Benjamin FranklinThough Ben... Read More
Jim Rohn wrote in his book The Five Major Pieces... Read More
Today I was glad that I had bothered to read... Read More
He was pencil thin and walked with a limp. A... Read More
Everybody wants to get to the top, whether it is... Read More
Get your act together Make sure that you have all... Read More
Is it difficult to be professional?I think from my experience... Read More
Are you getting frustrated because the work you continue to... Read More
Fourteen thousand civilised people died when the tsunami hit Andaman... Read More
If you want to be rich and famous, you have... Read More
So you want to be successful (whatever that means to... Read More
Success |