Do a little people-watching, next time you're in the grocery line. There's always someone with a cart, bulging with every conceivable kind of diet food. Flats of turkey bacon prop listlessly against the fat free half & half and Olestra cookies. At first glance, this is clearly someone who is completely health conscious, diet minded, and watching what they eat.
But peek beneath the basket to the lower rack ? where you normally find dog food, kitty litter, and toxic chemicals ? and you will see the full case of Mountain Dew. Diet foods and junk foods, rubbing wrappers in the very same cart might suggest mental illness, delusional optimism, or some other form of brain strain.
However, unbeknownst to the rest of us, these folks are actually brilliant physicists, cleverly disguised as profoundly confused shoppers, so as not to attract any attention. They throw you off their trail with very characteristic behaviors, like chasing a candy bar with a Diet Coke.
Yes, we can now release the fact that these scientists are members of the little know branch of their field known as gastro-physics, and they are actually testing a high-level theory regarding matter and anti-matter. Just as matter can be annihilated by anti-matter, they show how calories can be eliminated, obliterated, and just forgotten about altogether if you just consume them with their Universal opposite.
Oreos and skim milk cancel perfectly.
M&Ms are vaporized into the next astral plane when thrown into a trail mix bag with a few Spanish peanuts.
And then there's diet drinks ? the perfect dietary anti-matter for any form of plasticized fruit rollup, gummy worms, or even weight loss candy bars.
Sorry for the dive into the messy scientific details, but there's just a bit more you should know about this physics phenomenon. The calorie cancellation must happen within a certain time frame, if you are serious about blipping away that ingot of taffy you just ate.
It's like your mother explained, logically, that swimming after quick a baloney and cheese sandwich at the beach will make you drop like a rock to the bottom of the ocean, unless you wait the required 30 minutes or so.
In just the same way, modern gastro-physicists indicate that full cancellation can only take effect if the diet product smashes into the junk food within 7.45 minutes. These guys are brilliant.
So the next time you see cleverly disguised gastro-physicists chasing their Snickers with a Diet Coke, don't harrumph. They're not as daft as they seem.
About The Author
Dr. Will Clower is the award-winning author of The Fat Fallacy and founder of The PATH Curriculum, The PATH Online, and Newsletter.
The PATH: America's weight solution.
Dr. Clower can be reached on his website www.fatfallacy.com. www.fatfallacy.com
on demand house cleaning Winnetka ..Chances are if you've stepped foot in a gym or... Read More
Although many patients have few problems after bariatric surgery, there... Read More
Have you ever worried about something so much it paralyzed... Read More
Not losing weight but gaining it is why we are... Read More
Cellulite happens to us for many reasons. Some reasons-- like... Read More
Every Journey Worth Taking Begins with a Single StepHere are... Read More
One pound of fat equals 3500 calories. Want to lose... Read More
Changing habits is one of the most difficult challanges we... Read More
No One I Know Looks Like a Bathing Beauty, so... Read More
The latest trend in the area of weight loss is... Read More
I just finished working my quads on a weight machine.... Read More
Body wraps can help tone and tighten the skin, improve... Read More
It's the American Dream: "If I could just lose a... Read More
Food is not simply fuel to keep you going. Nor... Read More
I know a lot of people out there would like... Read More
How to Estimate How Many Calories You Can Have and... Read More
What to Do with the Leftovers?Okay, tell me if you've... Read More
If anyone knows anything about fitness, it's that a low... Read More
I wrote this article back in the late fall when... Read More
Are there any foods that burn body fat? If yes,... Read More
I'm sure you have pondered this question, for it is... Read More
Weight Loss Surgery (WLS) is often viewed as a quick... Read More
I have tried many "diets" here in the USA and... Read More
Sometimes it's good to just let the feelings flow. Take... Read More
Let's face when it comes to overweight and obesity there... Read More
house cleaning near Wilmette ..These days more and more people are getting intellectual instead... Read More
Weight loss surgery is fast becoming a very popular way... Read More
The market is flooded with weight loss supplements that make... Read More
You've done everything right this time. You're eating lots of... Read More
Your health is affected not only by how much body... Read More
I have had some e-mails come in and everyone is... Read More
--ONE--Learn how to reduce the fat, sugar and salt content... Read More
If you were going to travel to the other side... Read More
It comes as a surprise to many consumers that the... Read More
You've seen them a hundred times: "Before" and "After" pictures.... Read More
If you're thinking of going on a diet to lose... Read More
If I were asked, "what is the most difficult thing... Read More
Living a powerful, healthy, fit and trim life is a... Read More
Who'd have thought healthy eating could be so controversial? Lunching... Read More
The vast majority of postpartum women will not return to... Read More
Diet PillsTaking diet pills is definitely not an effective weight... Read More
Are you ashamed of your weight? Do you have a... Read More
Getting into a weight loss program or any type of... Read More
I gotta confess: I'm completely addicted to crisps. Any kind... Read More
Think for a moment about the highest mountain you ever... Read More
Any true body transformation starts with self?discovery. It is an... Read More
Have you ever decided to take a trip somewhere relatively... Read More
Many women want to be slim. Maybe you're one of... Read More
In this age being ignorant is like committing a crime.... Read More
Perhaps you've had them too, nightmares about rice cakes, granola,... Read More
Weight Loss |